Beautiful Life – Page 17 – Skies of Parchment

February 7, 2011March 20, 2013

Music Room Before & After

It’s a super cozy, wonderfully lazy Monday afternoon… It’s been raining steadily all day, actually for most of the past week. Combine that with a crackling fire in the hearth and I’m ever so happy. No snow this far south, but if it’s raining and I can have a fire, I’ll be happy. :)

I’m been wanting to do some more before & afters of the Cottage, but somehow it has taken me a while to get those pictures taken and uploaded. And with two active little girls, I find my computer time to be a bit lessened. Combine that with a New Year’s resolution [but wanting it to continue past just this year] – the goal to not be on the computer after dinner in the evening.

That’s been a stretch for me, I’ll admit. I didn’t realize how often I go online after supper. It was a good, easy thing of relaxation at the end of a busy day, but the down-side of that is that I could easily check out with Ben and the girls during our only family time of the day. And honestly, if Ben and I needed to talk through something, I could easily hide behind the screen instead of talking… :( So, I very much realize this is just my own choice and not something that’s for everyone. This is just for me. And if Ben is gone for the evening, don’t be surprised if I’m online at 7:30P.M. :)

I have found that I have SO much more time for reading than I normally did. It’s only the first week of February, but I’ve already read several books this year. I don’t have to wonder long where my free time was going… But we’ve been having so much good family time. Hide & Seek with the kids that is way more fun that being on the computer. Reading them lots of books. Feeling like I have a lot of time in the evenings…

And besides all that, I don’t want this blog to be all about my projects and my house and my… What I DO want it to be is an outlet for me to remember details about life and God and family and living and creating that I wouldn’t otherwise remember. To celebrate and treasure the little things. The not-often big things. To share a part of my journey with other people. To try to respect the privacy of my family at the same time…

And a great blessing that comes along with that is keeping current friendships in far-away places as well as meeting many new wonderful friends! Truly, I feel so RICH in friendships!!

So, today is a post to document the Befores and Afters of the Music Room/Family Room/Office.

Before:

[bright yellow/orange walls, but really in good condition otherwise]

[for better room flow, we moved the door to the left of the fireplace…

… to the right of the fireplace]

And After:

We began by painting the walls a neutral color, the same as most of the rest of the house. I wanted to go with a paint called “Biscotti” because how fun would that be to tell people the wall color?? But it didn’t quite fit the pallette I was wanting, so instead we went with “Tuscan Beige” by Ace Hardware.

This room is a walk-through room to the girls’ bathroom, the laundry room, and the master bedroom. We thought about closing part of it off to make a third bedroom [at present we have only two] and putting a hallway through it, but because of the option to add two bedrooms upstairs eventually, we decided to keep this room opened up. Besides, closing off the rooms would’ve meant getting rid of my baby grand, and that would’ve been a very sad parting…

When I was getting ready to work on this room last summer I asked on facebook if anyone has some old sheet music they weren’t using/would give/sell. My friend, Marylou, offered to send me an old book. It was a gem – I was so thrilled upon received it! Not only were the pages a very lovely aged color, but the titles of the songs are so delightful! Thank you so much, Marylou!!

I combined this old music with new books that I got off ebay for a song [yeah, didn’t even think of the pun, sorry]. And I kind of went a little happy with all of the music projects. I told someone I feel a little sheepish even showing this post because it’s a music overload!!

I began by putting these various sheets over the wall by the desk.
[This idea came from French Larkspur [blogspot], not original with me.]

Can’t forget to include this in the pictures. :)

The desk we picked up at a yard sale for $10, and then I painted it several years ago. That was when I was painting everything black. Now I realize there ARE other colors to paint things. :)

The chair was free at a yard sale last summer because the caning in the seat is coming apart, and we still haven’t fixed it. Hence the pillow to sit on while working at the desk. :)

The window panels I made from fabric that I bought for $1 a yard several years ago. I really wanted to go with a bright grass green for my accent color in here, but couldn’t find what I was looking for for the price I was willing to pay. So I ended up using some fabric from my stash….

This old [bald & hairless] rocking horse came from an antique auction. I used to think he was dreadfully ugly, but he’s growing on me. :) The girls love him, so why shouldn’t I? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, they say. :)

The jute rug I picked up on craigslist, the same time I got the rug for the living room.

Turn right at the desk and this is what you’ll see…

The old piece of furniture was bought as-is at my grandmother’s auction 5 years old. It badly needs a new paint job, and I’m not sure whether to leave it black all over, or paint the exterior white and the inside black? This room tends to be rather dark, even with the two windows.

White vase: Pottery Barn outlet for $1.99. Wish they’re still have cheap clearance like that.
Old Frames: auction for $1-2 dollars each
White bust: T.J. Maxx, I think
Quote plaque: gift from a friend ♥

I love bringing the outdoors inside. This mossy stuff is so beautiful to me!

Keep going clockwise, and watch out for the baby grand…

This was my birthday gift from Ben when I turned 24… I am a very humbly proud owner. :)

I got this wild idea to make a music tree [as if there wasn’t even of a music theme in the room]. So one afternoon when the girls were napping I traced an outline on the wall, then cut various music sheets to fit that outline. I thought it would take me days, but an afternoon was enough to complete it.

The bird cages were found at several different junk shops.

I bought quite a few books at my grandmother’s auction several years ago, along with these binoculars, which belonged to my late grandfather.

The round votive holder is from Pottery Barn – something I had watched in the catelogue for a very long time, starting out at over a hundred dollars, and finally finding it at the outlet for $30. I was happy. :) That was several years ago. Now, I think it’s a little “heavy” in style, but after waiting that long to buy it and then getting it for such a good price, AND storing it for several years until I had a house to put it in, well, I’m not selling it quite yet. :)

The 4th mantel/fireplace in the house. Not sure black is what it’ll always stay, but because I have so many fireplaces I didn’t want them all to be the same. So this is black.

I call this my “Wall of Words” – inspired largely by The Lettered Cottage’s reading room. Theirs is only words, if I remember correctly. I combined words, music, pictures – just a lot of things black and white. [whoops about the one picture falling from its frame]

The black frames were mostly bought at Goodwill for around a dollar each, average, and I spray-painted them black. When my sisters spent some time with me last summer, I conned them into doing some of the writing for the quotes I wanted on the wall. :) I used a combination of Scripture and some favorite quotes. The wall words were given to my by my mother-in-law, who found them at a yard sale! She is a yard sale queen! :)

This old globe also belonged to my late grandfather. Can you tell I’m sentimental? :)

And just for fun, before and after again:

And that concludes the Office/Music/Family room before & after!

[disclaimer: these pictures were taken during the naptime of two children. Should you happen upon us today, or any day for that matter, there is very little chance of the above room looking remotely similar and tidy. At the moment, there is a dishwasher-sized cardboard box in the middle of the room which is the “house” of the above-mentioned children and they would be disastrously devestated if the house would need to relocate anytime in the near future.
(p.s. the mother of the above-mentioned two children is learned and growing in the areas of letting children be children without demanding that messes be non-existant and playtimes be solely imaginary and with no fun props. Hence the cardboard house, which is stretching the imaginative developement of the children, and the perfectionistic tendencies of the mother, who is learning that happy children are worth far more than perfect houses, and that imaginative play is what will create wondeful memories rather than immaculately-tidy rooms].

~clarita

January 31, 2011March 20, 2013

a weekend is for….

… getting into big sister’s slippers

… eating lots of popcorn

… enjoying little girl profiles

[this is called “The Big Cheese”]

… breaking out the darling little popcorn boxes
[found at Michaels? A.C. Moore?]

… vacuuming several times in the course of the weekend,
just to clear away the said popcorn that keeps reappearing

… Ben tearing around with the chainsaw,
removing “junk trees” from the property border

… little girls playing hide-n-seek in the destroyed shubbery

… playing outside in the 70* weather.
Springtime, have you arrived several months early?

… enjoying a fire, not because we need it,
but just because Ben cut firewood again and we can!
[it’s been a cold month with no wood. now, on the day he cuts wood, it’s 70*]

… wondering what to do about my magnolia wreath, created only 2 weeks ago. Do people just use silk leaves for this kind of thing? These real one are curling and I fear soon to fall off. Hot glue isn’t always the magic ticket, sad to say.

… enjoying little bits of nature brought indoors –
mossy twigs and silver spray-painted pinecones.
Christmasy? No, it’s wintery.

… little girls that play “Mary and Joseph.” Oh, and Baby Jesus. Can’t forget him. And please DO call all children by their new names, they are no longer Olivia and Zoe’.

[“Jooo-THEPH!!” Mary says very sternly, when she, I mean he, isn’t cooperating with the donkey caravan “to Bethlehem” [quote] here. But all contention must have been resolved because later Mary was lying on the couch, gently crooning, “Oh, Jotheph, Jothepth,” in rather alarming endearing tones. I think The Nativity Story was watched a bit too many times.]

… little girls that love to play princess
[there are wild imaginations around here, just a warning. there are role changes many times a day].
And mommys that love to take Princess’s pictures spur-of-the-moment.
And make heart-chains spur of the moment.

… re-reading A Severe Mercy, by Sheldon Vanauken. One of the best books on love and marriage I’ve ever read. The oneness of spirit between the two of them is incredibly inspiring…

A Severe Mercy by Sheldon Vanauken (1992, Paperback,...

And that concludes a lovely, stay-at-home-all-but-Sunday-morning weekend.

Here’s to wishing for many more just that that one! :)

~clarita

January 4, 2011March 20, 2013

A Christmas to Remember

It’s a beautiful sun-shiney day in the south. Warm and balmy. Perfect for a walk or a run. At least it appears that way. So far my motivation has stayed indoors today. :)

Well, it’s been an eventful past week and a half. When I last posted, saying it was a “relaxing and quiet week” I had no idea what lay before me!

Christmas is my VERY favorite season of the entire year. I say “season” because the entire month of December is included in that. It’s a feeling the whole month long. The Christmas music [my new favorite this year was Bing Crosby. :) Something about that old crooning made me smile every time!]. The “Merry Christmas!” wishes everywhere we go. The festive decorations. The remembering the miracle of the Incarnation.

[Olivia being caught after sneaking off with the gingerbread house.]

We watched The Nativity as a little family, thankfully being warned beforehand that there are a few scenes which are best to be fast-forwarded for a very young and innocent audience. Those scenes would include the soldiers taking the babies [mildly put] and the birth scenes of Baby John (the Baptist) and Baby Moses [almost mildly put].

Zoe was absolutely enamored. She was absolutely spellbound, soaking it all in. It was so precious. She could not stop talking about it! Taking too much in, really, because afterward she asked, “Why wasth Mary thcreamin’ when Jostheph wath pullin’ the baby out?” My answer, “Well, uuuuuuuuuuhhh, because it hurts to have a baby, honey child!!” [was that answer enough?!]

When I went into the girls’ bedroom later that night to say goodnight, Zoe’ said, “I want to be Mary.” And when asked why, she said, “Becausth I want a little baby.” “When you get bigger and are married, then maybe God will give you a baby,” I replied.

“And then daddy [her assumed husband of the future is always Ben] can hold the sthringsth on the donkey, and I can thit on it, and he can take usth to the plathe where the theeps and the cowth and the animalth are. And then our baby will be BORN!! And it will be Baby JETHUTH!!” [the ending said with great excitement].

I couldn’t help but laugh aloud at her, so innocent and sweet and funny. But then after she was asleep I went back in and kissed her cheeks, and looked at her and cried. She is so innocent, so pure.

A role model of Mary. Not Barbie. Not some silly little cartoon character. Just precious…

I was thanking God that night for the privilege of being a parent.

A few days later I was thinking the parenting thing is slightly over-rated, as I sat at home on Christmas Eve, stroking fevered brows, reading stories to two little girls who were down-and-out SICK. It had started Wednesday evening, and I had hoped it would be a 24-hour sickness that runs its course quickly and be done with. Not so.

I will say, I actually rather enjoy taking care of my children when they’re sick. The mercy and servant side of me [which remains dormant most of the time] comes flowing out of my pores in circumstances like these, and I love to do anything I can to help them feel better. I found myself constantly saying, “Oh, I just feel so sorry for them!!”

Perhaps it’s partly my fond childhood memories of being “babied” by my mom when I was sick, even when I wasn’t a baby anymore. There is just something so good about knowing someone feels so sorry for you in times like those!

But when Christmas Eve Day came around and I realized that they were not going to be better by Christmas, I was an emotional wreck. Ben’s family was all in the area for the whole weekend, and I realized sick children meant no getting out and seeing anybody. No dinners, no parties, no extended family, no Christmas??

[anyone else’s kitchen ever look disatrous??]

God and I had a lot of “time-outs” on Friday. I couldn’t believe this was what my Christmas was going to be like, and had a really difficult time accepting the hard reality. Christmas is my favorite time of the year, and it was just going to be… nothing this year?? I thought about calling this post “Tears on Christmas Eve” but thought that’d be too morbid. :) That, however, is an accurate picture.

I finally made it to the shower around 1pm, and just cried. Cried out of disappointment. Cried because of how this Christmas was not what I expected or desired. Cried for strength to be a gentle mother to my children. And cried for strength to be a good wife to Ben despite my many emotions… Praying for it to somehow still be a special Christmas, to still find Jesus in it.

Christmas Eve night Zoe was not only sick, but feeling worse. We were concerned she had strep throat, and were contemplating an emergency room run. Zoe had been a patient little girl until that evening, and despite the sore throat, almost complete voice loss, and fever, had been holding up well. But that night she lay in her bed and just sobbed, or I should say squeaked – as much as a voice-less little girl could squeak out. It was awful.

Up to that point I had been fairly strong outwardly [the shower tears didn’t count!]. A few inward crumbles, but still holding together. But those painful little squeaks just set me over the edge. I just lay there beside her and cried along with her. So much for being a strong, comforting parent. I would have done anything to be sick in her place. There are few things worse than seeing your child in pain and not being able to do anything about it.

We did not take her to the hospital, but instead gave her some painkillers and other CVS remedies that Ben’s sister brought over late at night [BLESS you, Sonya!] to try to ease her misery. We fell into bed exhausted around midnight. The rest of the weekend seems like a blur – a cycle of holding, comforting, caring for, reading to [until I was almost hoarse], sleeping in their room at night with the girls [which meant the worst week of sleep of my entire life].

[we look like a pharmacy around here]

Christmas Day dawned clear and bright. And warm. Almost air-conditioner weather, but we built a fire in the fireplace anyway, just for atmosphere’s sake. :)

We exchanged our gifts as a little family in the morning, which brought smiles from the girls for the first time in over two days. We went very simple with gifts for the girls – gave them both a doll and some little German-made animals, which they absolutely LOVED. You’d have thought we spend our life’s fortune, so happy were they. :) I splurged on Ben completely, and bought him an ipod touch. I had been saving money from My Faire Lady, a few little photo things, and piano money, and he was thrilled to pieces. He’s been wanting one, but ever-frugal husband that he is, didn’t want to spend the money.

[sick children mean extra privileges, i.e. pacifiers even when it’s not bedtime]

Ben spent the afternoon with his family on Christmas Day since all of his family was together, a rare event. I stayed home with the children, and they both took LONG naps which was so refreshing for me. I was able to spend a few hours reading a book of my own calibar, and this quote struck me so powerfully:

“The future greatness of our race depends upon
those noble women who are able to pass on to
their sons and daughters a life which is true,
and brave, and worthy;
a life whose foundation is self-sacrifice,
whose cornerstone is loyalty,
and from whose summit waves the banner
of unsullied love of hearth and home.”
[Florence Barclay]

Ben returned home early in the evening and we spent the rest of the evening together – reading more books to Zoe, watching Tom & Jerry on youtube… much to Ben’s delight. :) Hey, on a sick Christmas Day, you’ve got to do something to brighten the moods!! :) Christmas Day was actually a better day for me than the one before – I had enough time to mentally prepare to just be at home that I was okay. Not so many tears that day. :)

My mom is so good for me in times like these. She listens to me over the phone, and I feel her sympathy, yet I always know a particular question is coming, to not let me stay in the dumps: “Well, think of what you DO have – what would be worse than this?” I thought initially that there is not much worse than sick children on Christmas Day [!!], but really, there ARE much worse things.

I could have a child with a chronic illness on that day, I could have a child no longer living that day… Yes, I had sick children that day. But I had children. Children whom I dearly love. Children who ARE going to get well one day. I have full arms. I really am blessed. Even if it was the saddest Christmas I’ve ever had.

Well, it didn’t end there. Ben got sick on Sunday, and spent most of the day in bed. Olivia was feeling much better by that point, so I took care of her while Zoe slept the day away with Ben. By Monday Zoe still wasn’t much better, so Ben took her to the doctor. No strep, like we thought it surely must be, but the doctor thought it was probably mouth sores down her throat, which just need to run their course…

[a bit of the outdoors brought inside]

Later that week the girls were both feeling better, but somehow when kids are getting better, but not all the way better, they get g.r.u.m.p.y. Or maybe it’s just my kids?? As in, ridiculously grumpy, where we had battles over the silliest things. Not carrying Zoe from Point A to Point B, about 15 feet, [she is three and a half years old] resulted in a tantrum. I’ve never known her to throw a tantrum all her three point five years, but she threw one that day. We had a little session in the “woodshed” and she now thinks tantrums are definitely not worth the effort.

[When “the sick” become “the grumpy”, I will admit my mercy and servanthood and all those other warm and kind emotions that flowed out of the pores before suddenly cease. Clogged pores somewhere. Bad attitudes don’t stand well with me. If you’re sick, be sick and I’ll nurse you and care for you and deal tenderly with you. But don’t be sick AND grumpy. All baby treatment ends at that point.]

But one day I called Ben in tears and asked if he could please come home for lunch? I was emotionally and physically exhausted from hardly sleeping at night due to sick girls, and was just wore out. We were still having ridiculous battles, and I felt like I wasn’t able to hold up anymore. He was working locally, something very rare, and I needed him desperately. He was a lifesaver. He stepped through the back door. I tried to be brave for 5 seconds, then fell into his arms, sobbing, “It’s SUCH HARD WORK being a mom!!!!!!”

My whole Christianity seems to be tested these days. How two small children can make me feel and act so selfishly is scary. No, not make. No one can make me act a certain way. Just bring out what is really inside. There is still so much work that Christ needs to do within me. SO much.

I thought of the quote by Amy Carmichael:

“The cup that is brimful of sweetness will not spill a single drop of bitter,
no matter how suddenly jarred.”

How I long to be like that sweet cup. But I know there has been a lot of “bitter water” that has been jarred out of me over the past two weeks.

A week later, the sores are mostly better for Zoe, Ben and Olivia are both recovered from their sickness as well, but all three of them have begun a really bad cough… So we’ve pretty much been cottage-bound for the past 2 weeks, with the exception of two outings over New Years’ weekend, and an amazing delightful gourmet meal prepared by my sweet friend Linda… Olivia has begun to BEG to go “bye-bye”, almost to the point of tears. We are all ready to be done with all sickness… and ready to get out and see people again!

So, Christmas of Twenty-Ten, a Christmas to Remember [and hopefully never to be repeated] is now history. Interesting, though, how I feel as though God prepared me for a different kind of Christmas. Sometime in December the thought came to me that this Christmas is not about me. I don’t think I’ve idolized Christmas before, but it’s always been my favorite time of year. And this year? It just felt different from the start.

“It’s not about me…”

Little did I realize how true that would be. Because this year instead of receiving much of anything, it’s been about pouring myself out of for my little family. Somehow, that is the place God had for me this Christmas – in our little cottage, holding and loving sick children and husband, and reading Bible stories to Zoe for hours upon hours. Truly, she should be literate in the history of the entire Bible because of how much she was read to!

Part of me is sad about “missing” Christmas, because to us it feels like it hasn’t happened yet. And I hear about snow up north, and I would love to be somewhere like that. But perhaps this Christmas was CHRIST lived out in our little family like I’ve never had to do before? Or Christ teaching me that CHRISTmas is about giving to others, even if it’s in ways that I would rather not do?

I had been thinking I would really enjoy having a particular older man over to our house, one that I doubt has 5 people in his life that he could say are his friends. And give him a Christmas. Show him love and friendship. Or have a family over from church that doesn’t have other family in the area. That was my kind of sharing-love-on-Christmas idea.

But God’s idea was different. And I admit, I didn’t like it. I wanted to be the strong, brave mother and wife who beamed all Christmas long despite the change of plans. Instead I felt like the weakest of all women, who desperately needed [and needs] God and my husband, who cried because I needed strength and grace, who sometimes lost patience with the grumpy children, who gets irritated by the constant coughing around here…

Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever learn. Ever learn the lessons God is wanting to teach me. Ever learn to just REST in His Sovereignty, even when His Sovereignty looks so different from what I was expecting.

[a lovely arrangement made by my friend Bethany, given for my birthday]

I might not have passed the Test of Christmas, Twenty-Ten, with flying colors, but I did come through it hanging onto Jesus with everything I am.

I might not pass the Tests of Twenty-Eleven with flying colors either.

But I want to walk through this year holding on to God with everything I am.
Just God.
Not expecting a lot of grand, huge things.

But wanting GOD.

That’s my heart for this new year…

-clarita

November 8, 2010March 20, 2013

Weekend Sweetness

This was a truly beautiful weekend.

[mosquito-bitten feet in cozy slippers]

The first Saturday home as a family in two months.

[my latest read: The Scottish Chiefs]

The first fire in the fireplace.

[apparently not too far into my book.
and just in case these pictures speak “perfect day” let me just say this:
it was a truly beautiful day,
but
I had literally 5 minutes of time alone Sunday afternoon
in which everyone was napping at the same time
in which I documented it with pictures.
rare things mean picture documentation.
as much as I would like to say it was a3 hour stretch, I can’t say it was.]

A surprise package in the mail from a sister. ♥

Biscotti baking and pumpkin roll baking.

[my mantel-less living mantel, with teetering decor balancing on the edge]

Time change, which gave us an extra hour Sunday morning
[definitely a good thing. Sunday mornings can be rather harried here].

[this picture looks very strange to me.
yes, i’m in the south.
sweet tea,
woolly slippers,
and a fire in the fireplace, thank you.]

Happy little girls who were delighted with have several days with their daddy at home.

[headless child pausing a rare, brief instant to allow me snap a picture of her tights]

Ben’s parents and siblings at home that came for Sunday lunch of a Belizian meal.

Creative little minds who pretend they are making oatmeal on a Monday morning…

[little bed-heads whose mother failed to comb them]

I just want to re-live it again.

Please?

~clarita

September 23, 2010March 20, 2013

Making Pretties

My online time the couple of months has been greatly limited, due to a three main things.

1. The daily joys and challenges of being a wife, mother, household-keeper, laundress, chef, grounds-keeper, teacher-of-how-children-should-get-along [to one’s own children]…

2. The weekly involvement in a Bible Study with four girls from our church’s youth group. I LOVE LOVE this… even though finding the time to studying amidst #1 can be challenging some weeks.

3. The preparation for My Faire Lady!

This was a brainstorm that happened upon me a few months ago – the idea to have a little booth at a local festival, exhibiting a few little things that are homemade. Cute homemade. ;)

[ruffled pillows, in charcoal and [not shown] in white]

So, after talking to 2 wonderfully talented friends in the area, the three of us decided to try to make a go of our idea! I am sooo excited to be doing this with Linda and Veronica – both amazing seamstresses and talented women!

[covered clipboards in small and large]

We are all having our own little niche, certain things that each of us are doing, and then we’re overlapping a bit too, in what we’re doing. Our little things include [this is all of us, not just me]: window panels, shoulder bags, diaper clutches, pacifier ribbon holder, burp cloths, clip boards, hair flowers and pretties…

[whoever knew there is so much COOL fabric out there. i want to start sewing for my girls next!]

[ruffled half-apron, in the making. Can you tell I’m in love with anything ruffly (??) right now? :)]

[Zoe, age three. Loving to be involved, and is constantly saying, “I want to WATCH you…”

So, in a little more than a week, we will be full-swing into

“My Faire Lady – an eclectic assortment of things beautiful, vintage, and feminine.”

[a sneak peak into the burp cloths]

[hair flowers. these are called ‘lollipop flowers’ – i googled them on youtube to learn how to make them]

It’s either going to be a grand success, OR I will have five years worth of gifts left over!! A little nervous about that. :)

So, these are just a few of the many things that will be [attemping to be] sold at our little county festival! If you’re local, be sure to come and check us out!

Happy weekend to you!

-clarita

September 10, 2010March 20, 2013

Dear Husband, Please Come Home

This is one day where, if it were possible, I would call Husband and ask if he could please come home from work at 10am, while I go and hibernate the rest of the day. Perhaps make the one hour drive to the nearest coffee shop and sit there. Maybe finishing my book, Cry, the Beloved Country and feeling like I’m really expanding my mommy brain. Something beyond child-training and husband/wife relationships. Which is good in its place, but somehow doesn’t feel very mind-stretching. I want to think outside of my world sometimes.

Not that I have a bad life. No, not at all. I really do love my life. Really.

But as we are all human beings, and as rather young human beings can be rather hard on a bit older human beings (read: children are unnerving mother), let’s just say that today is one of those days.

At the moment, life is quiet. Both girls are in bed for afternoon naps. I am sitting on the couch, still in pajamas (is that part of my problem, that I never truly started my day?), with a delicious broiled sandwich and a murky glass of lemonade. The murkiness is due to a certain 3-year old who was helping me in the kitchen one day during a baking project. And was mixing sugar into the flour container and flour into the sugar container. And as you well know, I’m sure, that sugar and flour are nigh to impossible to separate, I now have flour as well as sugar in my lemonade. Thus the reason for the murkiness.

This morning: not so quiet. The girls are beginning to have “sisterly competition,” to put it mildly. Let’s just say that big sister and little sister aren’t having such good days with each other, which can result in not-so-good days for mother as well. Little sister seems to be the main culprit, and loves to tease big sister to the point of tears. This morning was the occassion of many such tears. And at one point, having had enough, big sister pulled little sister off the couch by her feet, resulting in little sister landing squarely on her head, wailing loudly. Well, I would wail loudly too, if I were her.

I, the ever-wise mother (please read that very sarcastically) promptly rapped big sister on the head so she caught a small taste of what she did to little sister. Which was really a very bad idea, because then they were both wailing at the very same time. Well, I would wail loudly too, if my mother had just rapped me on the head. That was definitely not the love and tenderness of Jesus coming out just then.

And that was just a small glimpse of this morning.

Yesterday morning a bowl of cereal exploded in the kitchen, after someone accidentally dropped the honey bear into it from 2 feet above. I thanked the Lord that Zoe had vehemently requested a PLASTIC cereal bowl that morning, or else we would have shattered glass amongst the milk and granola that had landed up to 8 feet above the floor level, and spread in a 8 foot radius around my previously sparkling kitchen. Oh, and landing in my hair and eyebrows and face.

Oh, and did I mention the someone was not my daughter? No, it was, in fact, myself.

This house is full of imperfect people today.

I’m just so glad my PERFECT husband is coming home in a few hours! And will be home for the weekend!

Dear Husband, I’m so glad you’re the kind of man that I know will always come home to us…

And yet, in the midst of days that seem like “bad days” like this, I’m reminded of how precious life is, the lives of children who can have me so exasperated one moment and laughing the next.

With living across the street from the best children’s park in town, both of the girls frequently ask to go and play there. Well, Olivia points and jabbers incoherently. But they both love to go.

On Saturday, when I was outside with both of them, Zoe frantically yelled at me, “OLIVIA’S ON THE ROAD!!!” I look over from working in the flower beds not far away to see her completely crossing the street BEFORE MY VERY EYES.

I raced over to her, as fast as my legs in go in a dream-like state, where you want to run so badly but just can’t quite go fast enough, and scooped her up. Holding her tight as I could. Realizing that on our street, with a lot of fast through-traffic, I might not have ever held her again if…. Heart pounding. Mind racing.

I had nightmares all night and weekend about that incident. Waking up and seeing visions of things that didn’t happen, but could have happened. Realizing that on Sunday, instead of having people over for lunch as planned, we could have been planning a funeral. Sounds terribly morbid, I know, but I would wake up with a jerk thinking of what could have happened…

And I’m reminded once again of God’s Sovereignty, and am so thankful that He protected the life of our little girl. He would not have had to, but He did. And I am so grateful…

So today, I’m reminded of how sacred it is to hold them in my arms and rock them, singing lullabyes… Even though some days it feels like all we do is climb walls and write on white pillows with pencils and colored chalk. Today is sacred.

Even so, Dear Husband, I can’t wait until you come home…

~clarita

August 16, 2010March 20, 2013

Only in the South

I may have lived in the South for four years, but let me say, I am still in open-mouthed awe at the trucks these people like down here. Or maybe “awe” isn’t the right word. Perhaps “amazement” is a better word.

We were driving in a small southern town within several hours of where we live, when we drove past this truck. “TURN AROUND!” I said, in shocked tone of voice, not believing what I thought my eyes had seen. Dear, obliging husband turned around. And we both stared, open-mouthed, and then I remembered my camera and whipped it out.

“Oh nooooo!” Groaned husband. “You’re going to put this picture on xanga, and everyone is going to think that southerners are soooo redneck!”

Yes I will put this on xanga, but I will make a disclaimer and say that not *all* southerners drive a truck *quite* this big. Only half a big. :)

Need I even say that we live in Redneck Country?!